Just One of the Dudes
by ShanghaiLily
Summary: Jackie Burkhart is passed over by her school newspaper for a lucrative journalism internship because she's a woman. To prove sexism still exists, she goes undercover as a man at a rival school to write the ultimate expose for her college app. Things get sticky when she falls in love with the resident bad boy and can't reveal her true identity. "Just One of the Guys"/T70S X-over.


**Somebody posted a T70S/Breakfast Club challenge (which I am totally going to do) and it triggered an 80's reverie for me. I thought about all of my favorite movies from that era (I'm a Gen Xer) and realized how perfect the Jackie character would be for the lead in Just One of the Guys. Not sure if I'm going to continue this, it depends on the response I get from you all.**

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**Do not worry about 20 Questions and The Long Road Back. I _PROMISE_ I will not abandon either – I am working on both as we speak. I hate unfinished ff and I wouldn't do that to you all : )**

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**I don't own "Just One of the Guys" but I've probably seen it more than the people who made it.**

**I also don't own That 70's Show, obviously, or I would have ended it right with a J/H reunion!**

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**PS- this movie has Zabka as the baddie in it. ZABKA! If you're old like me, you know who I'm talking about and your one thought is "sweep the leg!". For you youngsters out there, google him- he's an 80's icon.**

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**CHAPTER 1**

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The year is 1985.

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Jackie Burkhart looks in the rear view mirror of her car and applies a final coat of strawberry Maybelline Kissing Potion to her plush lips. Today's the big day where her high school newspaper is announcing the student they're sponsoring for the coveted summer internship at University of Wisconsin's journalism department.

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She's the only girl up for the position, but her competitors are plebs who wouldn't know a footnote from a football. One of them wrote an opinion piece about the cheddar cheese industry in rural Wisconsin (snooze!) and the other wrote an article about Kenosha's annual hotdog eating contest. Her entry was an editorial on the growing influence of women on the national media stage. It was well researched, and she even managed to score interviews with the nightly anchors of her local news station. Basically, she has this in the bag.

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As she steps out of her car and heads into the newspaper classroom, she ponders which of her many practiced reactions would be most appropriate for this occasion. Of course she wants to make sure she comes across as humble, but false humility is one of the few areas that Jackie needs work in, so she opts for 'grateful', which shouldn't be too much of a stretch, because it's actually how she really feels.

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9am on the dot, and Jackie leans on her back leg, nervously tapping her front foot as she waits for the winner's name to be pinned to the announcement board. The other two competitors straggle in shortly after her and both glance nervously in her direction, not because they're worried about her winning out over them, but because she's the prettiest girl either of them has ever seen up close. Not too many hotties clog the hallways of the English department. Girls of her caliber usually hang out by the stadium locker rooms in cheerleading uniforms. Jackie plans to join her compatriots shortly after this.

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Mr. Johnston, a round, balding man with wide rim glasses trundles over to the cork board and covertly pins an index card to the middle of the board.

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"Oh my God. This is my moment" Jackie thinks to herself, trying not to get overexcited in public, since she'd rather die than ugly cry in front of a room filled with dorks.

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She leans into the wall to look and gets ready to put on her 'grateful face'.

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**_The Summer Journalism Internship at UW winner is: Brad Covington_**

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Jackie blinks rapidly at the lopsided index card, certain that an undiagnosed vision problem must have caused her to read her own name incorrectly. It has to be that, because what other reason could there possibly be to award Brad Covington, author of the world's most boring cheese opinion essay, as the official representative from their high school to a well-regarded internship program? WHAT? Deciding that there must be some mistake, Jackie squares her shoulders and marches into the journalism teacher's office, ready to sound off.

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She knocks on the door roughly and enters without waiting for a reply. "Mr. Johnston. I need to talk to you about the internship" she starts, barely getting into her speech before being interrupted.

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"My Jackie, you look really pretty today. That's a lovely dress" he says casually, truly taken by her beauty and completely oblivious as to the reason she might be storming into his office.

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"Yeah I know, but that's not why I need to talk to you. This is about the internship," she announces, trying to keep her composure when all she wants to do is beat him to death with his own cheap loafers.

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"Oh" Mr. Johnston shifts uncomfortably in his chair, unsure of what to say.

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"I worked really hard on it and even traveled to Kenosha to spend the day at the local NBC affiliate station. Can you please tell me what exactly you didn't like about my entry?" she asks earnestly.

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"Well, um, I liked everything about your entry, Jackie" he says sweetly.

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"Then can I ask what you liked so much better about Brad's opinion piece on cheese?" she asks. "I mean, I'm always looking to get better, and if you really think Brad's little cheese essay was better than my article, I'd like to know why," she tells him, trying to reign in her natural ability to give epic bitchface.

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"I just – I didn't think you were necessarily the right man for the job." he says, skirting the issue.

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"Well of course I'm not the right man for the job, sir. I have breasts," she says, starting to suspect foul play.

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Mr. Johnston chokes on the danish he's been eating. "Jackie, look, you're a beautiful girl, and you already have so many extracurricular activities that you participate in. You're a fantastic cheerleader and I know you're on the prom committee," he mentions, hoping she gets the drift without her having to spell it out for her further.

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"Yes, and...?" she prods. "I need all of those activities for my college resume. I'm trying to get a scholarship," she discloses.

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"Come on, Jackie. Girls like you don't need to go to college to meet a husband. You're going to do just fine snagging a fine young man right here in Point Place," he says, finally leveling with her.

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"Is that why you think I want to go to college? To get an MRS degree?" she challenges him.

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"I, um..." he doesn't know how to get out of this one.

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"You know what? Forget it. I'm done with this. Go find yourself a new student editor. I can't wait to see how cheese boy plans to turn this sinking ship around with his gonzo journalism." she spits as she turns on her heels. "One more thing," she says turning around "You can bite me!" she yells as she stomps loudly out of the building.

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"Don't cry. Don't cry. Don't cry." her mind warns her to try to beat the tears back as she power walks to her car. She can't let them see her cry. Barbara Walters wouldn't cry if Muammar Gaddafi said something mean to her. Jackie closes her eyes and thinks of Barbara.

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As she grabs the handle of her car door, she feels the dam starting to come loose. She quickly swings the door open, climbs in, and tears out of the parking lot leaving only the angry screech of burned rubber in her wake.

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* * *

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Back at home, Jackie opens up her journal and runs her fingers over the picture of her idol, Barbara Walters and cries like newborn baby.

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"Can you shut up?" a voice cries from the other side of her bedroom door. "You're throwing me off my wank game. The new Sports Illustrated swimsuit issue just arrived and you're ruining it for me!"

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"You shut up Eric, you pervert!" Jackie screams at the top of her lungs as she hurls her journal towards her door.

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"The last thing I need to hear when I'm trying to get off to Paulina Porizkova is my sister bawling her eyes out in the next room. Off-putting to say the least!" he complains loudly.

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"I don't give a shit about your grody sexual habits. This has been the worst day of my life, so you need to find a way to either work my crying into your pathetic sexual scenario or leave the premises, because I do not plan on stopping any time soon!" she sobs into her hands.

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The door opens a fraction and a beige handkerchief waves inside. "I'm waving an off-white flag," Eric declares, surrendering. "Can I come in?"

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Jackie screws up her face. "Is that handkerchief clean?" she asks, almost afraid to know the answer.

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The door opens and Jackie's slender twin brother enters her room. "I told you, I _just_ got the mail. So yeah, it's clean. For now," he grins.

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"You're a pig" she sniffs, secretly happy that she now has a shoulder to cry on.

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Eric envelops his sister in his strong arms and rubs her back. "What happened, loser?"

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"I didn't get it" she says, sadly.

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"You what? Are you joking?" he questions her, disbelieving that she could possibly come in second to anybody.

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"My teacher basically told me I didn't need to go to college to get married. As if that's why I'm doing all of this! If I just wanted to get married, all I'd have to do is wear a shorter shirt" she miffs.

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"That blows, J. I'm sorry. I read those other guy's articles and they sucked big time. What a jackass," he growls angrily.

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"The worst part about it is that I was counting on that internship to get me into the program. Now I don't know what the hell I'm going to do" she whines then picks up a brush to fix her hair. "Oh yeah, and I quit the paper and told Mr. Johnston to bite me," she laughs, finally finding the humor in the situation.

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"You did what?" her best friend Donna, a striking redhead, exclaims from the doorway. "Are you freaking kidding me? That's awesome!" she squeals, drifting past a lovelorn Eric as she goes to hug Jackie.

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"What am I going to do, Donna?" Jackie wonders, suddenly panicking.

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"Let me get this straight" she says. "You really quit the paper?"

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"Uh-huh" she confirms, "because the teacher is a sexist pig who thinks girls can't be journalists. I can never show my face there again. How am I going to get into a journalism program when I'm no longer writing for a student paper?"

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Donna paces the room while stroking her chin. "Well, why not lend your talents to a rival newspaper and show them just what they're missing?" she suggests. "I mean, the year is almost up, it would be the perfect time to switch schools."

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"My parents would never approve of that" she sulks.

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Eric raises an eyebrow. "But what they don't know won't hurt them, right?"

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Donna gives Eric a coy smile. "What is your devious mind cooking up over there, Burkhart?"

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"Our parents went on an extended holiday for the entire Summer," he discloses. "We're completely on our own for two months. We drive ourselves to school, so they'd never know until your first report card came in, and at that point, it would be too late to switch you back," he devises, rubbing his hands together in thought.

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"That's freakin' brilliant" the redhead nods approvingly.

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"But what if I run into the same problem? Seems like everybody's a sexist nowadays. I guess it's the thing to do" she rues sarcastically.

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"You could always just show up to school dressed like a dude" Eric jokes.

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Jackie and Donna look at each other meaningfully. "Do you think it would work?" Jackie asks her friend.

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"I mean, it's crazy, but then again, you're pretty crazy too, so it might be worth a shot," she smiles widely. "It would make quite the undercover story."

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Jackie's eyes widen and she claps her hands with excitement. "We are SO doing this, you lumberjack!"

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"Woah woah woah. Ladies, I was kidding. I mean, are you forgetting something? My sister looks nothing like a dude. At all. In fact, there's nobody on earth who looks girlier than she does. She practically has Snow White's bluebirds getting her dressed in the morning," he smirks.

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"You could enroll at my school" Donna offers excitedly, ignoring Eric's protests. "How much fun would it be to hang out together every day? I've missed you so much since your dad made you transfer to "Our Lady of Perpetual Sorrow" she says heartfeltly.

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"Are you really serious about this?" Eric asks, putting his sister on the spot.

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"You know Eric, I think I am" she says, a giant grin overtaking her face.

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He looks at his sister, then longingly at her best friend. "Well, you'll need somebody to look after you," he decides. "So, if you're transferring, I'm going too."

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Jackie throws her arms around her brother as he lifts her off the ground.

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"You are going to be the wimpiest guy ever if we don't do something soon" he assesses.

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"Yeah...that may pose an issue" Donna agrees.

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Jackie stands on her bed. "Well, we've got two months and three evil masterminds working on this, so I'm feeling pretty good about our chances" she proclaims with swagger as she trips and falls, tumbling gracelessly to the floor.

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Donna side eyes Eric as a palpable look of dread overcomes his features. "You were saying, Eric?"

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End file.
